She Despises Her Body

Society convinced her she’s ugly; her beauty persuaded her she’s not. Society is a broken mirror but it’s the only mirror she’s got.

I think as women, we deal with a lot of confidence issues. We worry about our weight, looks, flaws and all. Sometimes we get discouraged when we are not feeling our best. Society deems women to be perfect, we read catalogs and see all these celebrities looking absolutely impeccable, so then we start comparing ourselves. We think the whole world recognizes the one flaw we hate so much and we try to mask all the pain it’s causing us. We cry in our bathrooms and question our whole existence. But I believe happiness comes before confidence. If you have accepted your differences and have come to the conclusion that magazine women are airbrushed and real women aren’t, then I strongly believe that your flaws wont hold you down.

I’ve come to the realization that I am human, I am a female and sometimes the men I speak to might require me to be perfect, because that’s all they see on social media. But I am not. I break out, I have dark spots, my hair is hard but gets soft in water, I am annoyingly hairy and I eat a lot. I won’t ever have a butt as big as the whole Kardashian clan and Dr. Miami wont fill my boobs with implants (because I wont let him) and that’s okay because I know me, I know my flaws better than anyone else and I have accepted my imperfections. It took years of getting to know all of me, and I literally mean ALL OF ME, and I am still in the process of letting go and just giving you the “Kanye shrug” like fuck it! This is me.

My journey to womanhood is no joke. It’s pretty stressful and I think it is never ending. It is very easy for people to write books about confidence and for people to say “love yourself, be confident”. I think it is easier said than done. I believe that self-confidence takes time and practice. It also takes experience. It doesn’t come over night but you have to start with actually doing.

“Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.

I’m not cute or built to suit a fashion model’s size”   - Maya Angelou